March 16, 2021

I hit the X!

There really is no excuse for what a law-abiding citizen in the State of Maryland has to go through to purchase a handgun. 

I've been fingerprinted and my prints sent to the state police and the FBI. They found nothing. OF COURSE they found nothing. I'm a law-abiding citizen. 

I had to take a four-hour safety course on how to handle a gun. Did I get to handle a gun? Nope. I watched the instructor handle a gun. I don't have a gun so I had no hands-on instruction. 

I got to test fire a handgun a sum total of eight times. Not my gun. Not the gun I have to learn to handle. Not the gun I need to know how to break down and clean, put back together so it doesn't blow up in my face, and load and unload. Nope. 

Why didn't I get to learn how to handle my gun? Because I can't purchase it until the paperwork comes through. How fucking stupid is that? 

I got to pick up the instructor's gun and fire at a target. 

Yeah, baby. I hit the X in the center. 

Then the spousal unit fired the gun eight times. He let me win, I'm sure, because he didn't hit the X. 

Laws really are only for honest people, and they punish honest people in the stupidest ways. Honest, law-abiding citizens do not buy a handgun to shoot another person. They purchase it to shoot venomous snakes and rabid raccoons. Or go to the brother's backyard and plink at targets stuck on a bale of straw. Or fire a few shots in the ground to scare off a flock of blackbirds. 

I'm more of a threat to others when I get behind the wheel of my very fast, zero to sixty in a few seconds, corner on a rail, four-thousand-pound car that can flatten your ass into the pavement. Not that logic rules in this world. 

The Lady of Holly Tree Manor


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