I've been pondering what, if anything, needs to be recorded about Christmas 2025. Many things have been laid on my heart this season, and I hardly know where to begin. There is a wisdom that says look to the big things first, and the small things will fill in around them. I think that is true.
This was my second Christmas without Ron. I could argue it was really my third because in 2023, he was sicker than I knew, and he wasn't talking. He was here, but he slept most of the time. I worried, but without his cooperation, there wasn't a lot I could do.
So, Christmas alone. Yes. Ron's sister had me up to her house twice, but Christmas Day was spent alone. On Christmas Eve, my cousin and I walked the dogs in the morning, and that was the only person I talked to all day. Christmas morning brought a flurry of texts, but I spoke to no one. There is a peace, and a reckoning, to silence and solitude. I sat with my thoughts and they were good company.
I thought about making a Christmas Day video, but shelved the idea. I'll get around to making one shortly, after dinner at the cousin's house. Today is when all the grandkids can come. Their respective father's get them on Christmas Day, and we don't make a fuss about it and make the kids feel guilty. Their grandparents are smarter than that. In a few short years, the grandkids will be able to decide for themselves where they want to be for Christmas. We shall see.
I stopped decorating for Christmas a decade ago, when adding a tree to our smaller space would have gotten in the way of Ron's wheelchair. This year, I almost missed having one. I debated getting one until I saw the price tags. Nooooooooo. The little ceramic tree that came from my grandmother will suffice. I did, however, do a small craft project to hang some of my fancier balls in the front window. It was enough to satisfy the urge to decorate. The bow window has four glass panels, and I didn't realize my project would look like a cross once hung. I think I'll modify it next year.
Ron was a great gift-giver. Over the years, he gave me three sets of pearls. The first set was a choker with stud earrings. I loved it - a lot. But this year, I gave the set to his daughter. She cried. I felt a few pangs parting with the pearls, but she needed something of value from her father, and that was the best I had to give her. It's not like she needs a set of Snap-On wrenches, so it was the pearls.
The only close female cousin I grew up with called me yesterday to tell me she's going to be a grandmother again. Totally unexpected, unplanned, but everyone is happy about it. I'm given to understand her son is going for the snip-snip early in 2026. At least they know how it happened!
It may have been Christmas Day, but gardening fever is beginning. I measured the outside dimensions of my garden space and trolled the Internet for the type of fencing I want for my corner. I checked out websites for seeds, and I suspect the good stuff won't come online until after the Christmas sales. I looked at elevated beds and decided I don't need something off the A-list. How many more years will I be gardening? I don't know, so a product that will last eight to ten years is sufficient. This year coming, 2026, needs to be the year I go ahead and purchase everything I want so I will have a few years to enjoy having my garden space "perfect for me."
Deuce officially turns ten in January 2026. I've resisted visiting Labrador websites. Do I really want to get a puppy in 2026? Do I want to get another dog at all? I always thought Deuce would be my last dog and Ron and I would have more freedom to be away from home for longer periods of time. That certainly did not work out as planned. As I get older, I worry who will care for Deuce if something happens to me. It'll be worse with the next dog. It's sobering to consider.
This Christmas has driven home just how many ways my life has changed. It's not better, it's not much worse, but it is different. Change comes to us all, and it is often an uncomfortable bedfellow. Not even hope, peace, love, and joy can alter the progression of time.
The Lady of Holly Tree Manor/The Hideaway
Holly Tree Manor, The Hideaway, Christmas 2025, black Labrador Retriever, family, aging, life changes, holiday recollections, rural living, country lifestyle,
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