My Grandmother's lamp

Before I was born, my mother gifted my grandmother with a lamp. My grandmother loved it! It was one of her treasures and it sat in a place of honor in her living room. I don't remember a time when it wasn't there - until it wasn't. It vanished one day when the daughters of my closest first cousin were small, back in the 80s.  My mother and I were afraid to ask, and my grandmother never divulged what happened. 

Mom and I feared the worst. Mom was angry. I was sad. Had the girls managed to break it? The answer turned out to be that they had not. 

My grandmother passed in 1997, and Mom had the task of helping my grandfather take some necessary steps at his house. The lamp was discovered, safe and sound, in a spare bedroom. My mother immediately brought it to me. Mom had purchased the lamp, and to her way of thinking, it now should be returned to her, and she wanted me to have it. 

My grandmother's lamp is one of the many treasures of hers that I've kept over the years. The lamp has been a fixture in my writing cave (office) since I made the dedicated space. Yesterday, I got a set of new lamps and switched them out in preparation for passing my grandmother's lamp to her eldest great-granddaughter, one of the very girls my mother had been convinced had broken it. 

My lovely second cousin will in a few weeks celebrate her fortieth birthday, and it seemed the appropriate time to pass the lamp to her. She does remember it from her childhood and so I'm happy she has the memory of it. She knows it's on the way to her and I know she will keep it safe, hopefully to pass it along to her eldest daughter. 

Will I miss having it? Will I miss that connection to my grandmother every time I step into my office? Yes, I will. Had I known how much I may have held off another year or five. No matter. It's a done deal and I've done exactly what my grandmother would have wanted. I've passed on a treasure to the next generation so that they can enjoy it. 

Thanks, Mam. I took care of it for you. 

The Lady of Holly Tree Manor (The Hideaway)

Holly Tree Manor, The Hideaway, family, cousins, lamp, heirloom, pass it on, rural lifestyle, country living, a writer's life, grandmothers, do the right thing

Hosting a Cousin's Lunch

This past Saturday, we hosted a Cousin's Lunch. It's not as grand as it may (or may not) sound, but these small get-togethers are a high point for me. Several years ago, pre-pandemic, me and my two surviving first cousins decided we didn't sit down at the table together enough, the way we did when we were younger, and we wanted to remedy that. We decided to meet for lunch every quarter. The Covid-19 pandemic derailed us, but we hope that's a thing of the past. 

I decided to invite them to an afternoon on our patio so we could enjoy each other's company and the glorious autumn weather. The patio is screened so insects are not a problem. Our new countertop provided the perfect staging area for the food and left us plenty of room at the table. The lunch fare was pure picnic with hamburgers, potato and macaroni salads, Cole slaw, baked beans, apple cider, apple cake, and some chips and dips. We are blessed with abundance and we all ate too much. 

Maybe it's a sign of being older, but I didn't stress about hosting my cousins. We did a cursory "house cleaning" and let it go at that. The house is always clean enough to be safe and dirty enough to keep our immune systems paying attention. Deuce was a perfect gentleman pup, and I do mean PERFECT.  The one cousin-in-law has been less than enthusiastic about dogs (I think she's a bit afraid of them) and even she had not one snark over his presence. Lunch lasted late into the afternoon as we were all reluctant to part company again.  Next fall, I hope we can do it again. 

And maybe next fall, if we're able to gather, I'll reach out to a girl who is a second cousin to me and D, but not R. They know each other, that's not the 'issue.' We started the cousin's lunch for the first cousins, but now that we're getting older, maybe it's time to include L. I'd certainly like that. She and I were very close growing up. 

It's bittersweet to reflect back with memories of our youth. We've all lost parents, and R has lost his brother, too. My mother has Alzheimer's Disease and is lost to me and the world. Time was our Christmas happened on Christmas Eve at D's house when his mother hosted all of us for dinner and gift exchange. We became teenagers in the 1970's and we hung out together. Life got busy for us but now I'm the last one still working, something that I'm trying to remedy. 

Our memories are a big part of who we are, and I'm so grateful to be making new ones with my cousins. Time has become precious, and spending more time with the people who have been most important to me for all of my life is a high priority. 

I'm reminded of some very special words from artist Neil Young: 
We've been through some things together

With trunks of memories still to come
We found things to do in stormy weather
Long may you run, long may you run
Although these changes have come
With your chrome heart shining
In the sun long may you run.

Long may you run. 

Long may we run. 

The Lady of Holly Tree Manor (The Hideaway)