When you least expect it

Just yesterday I posted about retiring. By the end of the workday, I'd had enough and I submitted my letter of resignation, effective July 31, 2021. 

Talk about something feeling anticlimactic, yes, it did. It felt like nothing at all.

There's no panic, no second thoughts, only relief that the letter is in and I can now actively wind things down. After twenty-one years, I have a bit of stuff to haul home. 

I'm not sure how I thought I would feel, but this "nothing" isn't it. For the first time in probably my adult life, I don't have a sense of urgency over all the things I want to get accomplished this weekend, or even this summer. I've entered a sort of waiting limbo. 

The Lord of the Manor has yet to question me. I think he's digesting the fact he's going to lose his private kingdom a bit sooner than anticipated. I'm sure we'll work it out. I do expect to spend a certain amount of time each day at my computer with my writer's hat on. That should give him sufficient time to do whatever it is he does all day. 

I don't want to get overly excited, but I can feel the excitement building in me. I've realized so few dreams in my life, well, only one if the truth be told. I was and am recognized for my writing. But the biggest dream I have for myself, the one that is most important, is to truly BE the Lady of the Manor. To be here, on the land my grandfather gave to me and that I love as much as he did. 

Perhaps Neil Young said it best: We've been through some things together, with trunks of memories still to come. We found things to do in stormy weather, long may you run. Long may you run, long may you run, although these changes have come with your chrome heart shining in the sun, long may you run.

Now a new Saturday beckons, one that I hope retains the peace I feel this morning. Long may I run.

The Lady of Holly Tree Manor